What is impossible..?

Have you ever felt like life bombarded you with a roller coaster you never stood in line to ride?  Life has twists, turns, ups, and downs.  If you pay attention you'll see that regardless how the moment right now you are facing looks there are a lot more ups than downs.  It is sometimes hard to see through the tears, and the moments that it seems as if nothing will ever go right.  

Matthew 11:28-30 says:

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." 

I have been weary and burdened to the point of complete physical exhaustion.  Do you feel like that at times?  Especially, when part of the time you get physically exhausted from driving to and from different appointments.  Between normal everyday stuff, to the unexpected twists or pot holes in life that causes bumps and even some bruises, GOD is still there.  May not feel like you can easily feel or even speak with him like we can text, email, or phone someone to talk to, but HE is there.  

Last time I admitted my faith has faltered.  This time I feel a little stronger.  IT IS OKAY TO ADMIT YOU ARE WEAK.  You have permission to make a mistake and not feel judged by it! We as parents have our words, and actions, and even our emotions judged by people around us.  To those who want to judge: I forgive you for judging my character as a parent based on only what you could see without getting to the heart of the issues surrounding me and my family.

I have learned through my roller coaster of life that judging someone else based only by what I can see or hear leaves me without compassion, or an awareness of something that very well might be my family one day.  It can also leave you without a friend for life.  Who wants to be surrounded by those who judge you as a person, parent, friend, etc.? No one does.  It's like surrounding yourself with negative influences that will eat away at you.  

Another way life bombards us is the natural thinking of comparing ourselves to those around us.  I mean at times it seems someone else has it more together and you think, "Oh I wish I could be a super mom like her.  How does she/he have it all together?"  Guess what?  They probably don't.  If they do, than Kudos to them.  Life bombards everyone, no one is exempt from heartache, pain, struggles, or stress.  This roller coaster we are on begs us to hang on until the ride gets less bumpy and braces you for the track ahead.  

It may seem impossible to see around the next turn or hold on past this next bump, but it is possible.  All things are possible.  If what you perceive was impossible, there wouldn't be those who have endured it before to come out on the other side of it to tell their story.  

Matthew 19:26

Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." 

Excerpt from a devotional in "Mom's Devotional Bible" -'When Mountains Won't Move:

When the mountains won't move, we can hold tight to the God who is in control and let him lead us through these days, picking the path around the mountains to the other side. 

So today, remember to hold on because the ups in life outweigh the downs.  You may be in a valley right now and can't see a way around your mountain, but hold on.  The climb to the top may be tough, but the view will be spectacular. 

Grace with side of life...

I was asked if I would think about blogging my experiences.  As a form of therapy for myself, but also a way to experience through my own eyes the world at which times may slip me by due to the busyness of life. So here it goes:

I am not a supermom.  I will never be a supermom.  I don't want to be.  Those outfits others mask themselves with, I don't want to hide behind a mask.  I want to be real.  As real as I can be.  Have you ever watched a hero or an underdog movie?  That's who you rally to win while watching the movie.  One of the movies I enjoy watching is "Here comes the Boom".  What a great movie!  An underdog, just trying to do something good for his friend and school. In turn inspires himself and others.  What a great story.  

Have you had those come along side you and rally you to keep going?  Encourage you in your walk as a person or a parent?  Gave you a hug when you just didn't know you needed one until it happened?  I must admit, there are days it is hard to keep my head up.  I'm in a hard fight right now.  You see, life has knocked us quite a bit.  It has bent me to the point of breaking.  Emotionally, mentally, physically, and even spiritually drained.  When your child hurts, you hurt.  When your child struggles, you struggle.  At times I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of darkness, while the helicopters with spotlights are whirring overhead in the wrong direction.  You're in the background yelling, "Hey, I'm over here.  Come on!  I'm drowning over here.  I can't hold on much longer."  

Have you ever felt that way?  You are desperate to be rescued.  You are treading water.  You get restless and weary.  You feel as if you are about to just let go and let whatever happen, happen.  Then, as you are about to give up.  Something comes along and rescues you.  Life is not easy.  I see others who have been put down or not encouraged in their walks as parents and it makes me upset.  We all need prayers and uplifting, even when it seems we might have it all together.  We may be good at putting a smile on our face when inside we are crumbling.  I have grown to genuinely care for the women in my Tuesday morning bible study.  Even when I don't want to go because the week has tore me down, I fight through that because I NEED IT!  This past week had knocked me down something awful.  The study challenged me.  Of all the questions I could have picked out of a stack that was given. Not sure if this is the exact question, but I'll attempt to remember it's phrasing.  

"Are you a truck just sitting in a parking lot when you are meant for a track? if yes, why?" Well, I was honest and couldn't fight the tears anymore.  I'm in a parking lot.  One thing after the other kept happening and figuratively I was knocked on my knees.  To which my friends carried this scripture out beautifully for me:

The bible states in Galatians 6:2 NIV

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

My youngest has struggled in school especially.  We almost lost her to a nocturnal seizure feb. 13, 2010 at almost 3am.  I'm at times what you would call helicopter mom.  It was so hard to take her to a school, show someone else how to use rescue meds should they have to and pray they don't ever have to.  Thankfully, even though she has had seizures off and on since that horrible night, she is growing.  We are trying to do behavior therapy with her.  She has speech and OT.  There are times when someone will say, "oh she's so cute.  How old is she, 3?  Um, no actually she'll be 7 in July.  To which, some say, "Really?  Oh she's so small."  Others give me a look as if to say, "what happened?" She still has the voice of a small child, but she is mine and coming along. Which leads me to this:  

How can we be an encouragement to others around us when life is hard on them, but we don't open our eyes to see it?  We stand and judge them based on just what we can see.  One thing the storms of life has shown me is:  Can I be more understanding and compassionate towards someone?  Is my journey somehow showing others the LOVE of GOD. 

I admit freely.  My faith has faltered a lot and I've had doubts.  It is difficult not to when you've lost a child.  When you watch another one of your children struggle with being teased or with academics.  Another one struggle here and there with medical issues.  Daily they struggle with frustrations and how to express themselves.  When you've watched family in physical, emotional, or mental pain for years.  Why them Lord? Why?  I still don't have answers, but what I do know is:  

I was never promised a walk filled with roses or to never struggle.  If I didn't struggle I may not even have a genuine need for God in my life.  Someone once said, "You never know just how much you need GOD in your life, until HE is all that you have."    

So, even though life is hard. That is true for everyone.  No one is promised a walk without a few stumbles along the way.  We can take it with asking for 'Grace with a side of life'.

Romans 11:6

6And if by grace, then it cannot be based on works; if it were, grace would no longer be grace.